


The Ultimate Punishment

by carolelained



Category: The X-Files
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-02
Updated: 2016-02-02
Packaged: 2018-05-17 20:38:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5884399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carolelained/pseuds/carolelained





	The Ultimate Punishment

The Ultimate Punishment  
By CarolelaineD

  
Fox Mulder had spent the week working very hard, but during that time he had pissed off Skinner over his expenses, the higher ups could not grasp the fact that the X files required a lot of field work. Mulder had also been sent to Oregon on a promising lead that turned out to be a hoax. Glad to be back home at the end of the week, his only plans were involving a large pizza and a six pack of beer.

Mulder had ordered the pizza and opened a beer after which he enjoyed a quiet night drinking and watching videos. Many beers later he knew that he would have a hangover as he was not a big drinker, but for once in a very long time Fox Mulder fell asleep with a smile on his face.

However, Mulder was far from smiling the next morning. Fuck, he had one hell of a hangover, so he decided on some painkillers and going for a long run. When he returned, Mulder felt a lot better as the fresh air had done his head some good along with his mood.

He decided to shower and dress in some jogging pants before he went to his PC and wrote a report, Skinner was already pissed and Mulder had no plans to antagonize the man further.

Mulder had spent over an hour on the report when he heard the knock, Fuck! He had hoped to finish the report today so he could do what he wanted on Sunday.

The knock came again but much louder this time, Mulder knew he had no choice but to answer it. He opened the door to a smiling delivery man.

"Yes? Can I help you?"

"Depends, are you Mr. Fox Mulder."

"Yes I'm Mulder. What can I do for you?"

"I have a parcel for you, but it needs a signature."

Fox looked down at the large crate and wondered how much room in his apartment the contents would require.

"Does it have a return address?"

"Yes, sir, the sender's address is Martha's Vineyard; it also says it's antique and to handle with care."

Mulder was not happy and wondered what the fuck his mother had sent him as he watched the delivery man use a set of wheels to move the crate.

Once it was in his living room, Mulder signed for it and closed the door. For God’s sake, his mother knew that he lived in a small apartment. Well, whatever hideous antique she had sent could wait until his report was finished.

Two hours later, Mulder was really pleased because the report was finished and he now had the rest of the weekend to himself. He opened a beer and sat there enjoying it as he stared at the crate that was in front of him, he knew that he would have to open it soon as his Mother would expect to be thanked.

Mulder put the beer down and went in to the kitchen returning with a screwdriver, he then undid all the screws and removed the lid from the crate.

He soon realized that there was a lot of packaging and secretly hoped the object was small, he used his hands to remove the excess packaging taking care not to break the contents, he soon pulled his hand back when his fingers touched something warm.

What the fuck could his mother send him that was warm to the touch? Mulder's curiosity got the better of him as he started to remove more packaging. When he saw skin, he decided to move faster but even Fox Mulder who had seen so much was shocked by the contents.

There in the crate lay his worst enemy, Alex Krycek, naked, unconscious, and covered in cuts and bruises. Mulder noticed that there was a note attached to the man's chest with tape, his heart beat faster as he knew this was not a gift from his mother.

Someone out there had known to use his mother's address to get him to accept it, so he decided to read the note and find out who.

Dear Fox Mulder,  
Please find enclosed a present from myself, Alex Krycek now belongs to you to do as you see fit.  
I can only hope that you now finally get to use the anger you have kept inside for so long.

It will be a great pleasure to rid myself of this certain rat, and, yes, dear Fox you will be doing your enemy a favour but this will also benefit you.

You now have your one and only chance to get revenge for your father's death.  
By the way, your mother has no part in this gift. I just wanted to make sure it was received by you.

Alex Krycek now belongs to you and you only, I do hope that you are man enough to take care of this problem.  
You see Fox you have a choice, make him disappear permanently or we will ourselves.

I hope that you enjoy your gift, Fox. Maybe you might want to amuse yourself with him first since he has a few useful tricks up his sleeve does our young Alex. May I suggest that if he's unwilling just take what you want from him, torture him, use his body whatever but just kill him afterwards?

Enjoy yourself.  
C.G.B.S.  
P.S. Alex was given a mild sedative, but it will wear off soon so take care. Never take your eyes off him or turn your back on him as he has a wild side.

Fox sat there staring at the note feeling sick. He could not kill an unarmed man no matter what he had done much less could he kill a man who was naked and unconscious.

Did they expect him to rape his enemy? Mulder knew that all the thinking could be done later; for now he had to move and take care of his present.

With some difficulty he managed to get Alex out of the crate and into bed; Mulder covered him with a blanket and waited for Alex to wake up. He sat there drinking a coffee and just thinking about things. Shit, he couldn't take Alex in to custody, or he would be killed.

As much as he hated Alex, he would not kill him or hand him over to be killed as he would still be responsible for the man's death.

Sometime later, Mulder realized that he had no choice but to keep Alex hidden in his apartment, but he wondered how the hell he would do that without chaining him up.

Alex had a record at running away from everything. No matter what happened, he would have to try and convince Alex that he would be safer with him.

He realized that this rat was now solely his responsibility. Great! One pet rat by the name of Alex! Fox suddenly came out of his daydream when he heard screams come from the bedroom.

Mulder was expecting a fight and the prospect of cuffing Alex and keeping him against his will, but when he opened the bedroom door Mulder realized that Alex might need restraining for different reasons.

Mulder had always thought of the other man as rather cocky and arrogant. He was not prepared to see Alex huddled in a corner screaming and absolutely petrified.

"Alex, it's me, Mulder, do you know where you are?"

The screaming continued until Mulder could take no more and slapped the hysterical man hard across the face. Mulder was greeted with silence and a totally glazed stare from the man.

He had no idea what to make of Alex but every time Mulder went near him the screaming would start all over again.  
In the course of time Mulder was left with no choice other than to leave the room, he realized that this was no longer the man he knew and hated.

What had they done to reduce him to this?  
After an hours silence, Mulder returned to the bedroom to find Alex asleep. He left some sandwiches and water but decided to leave him naked as he was afraid that he might start screaming again.

Mulder realized that he himself was really tired. He locked the door and windows, checking them nervously. He thought it might be easier to think if he got some sleep, but first he hid his keys and his gun.

After only a few hours’ sleep, Mulder woke to loud screaming coming from the bedroom. He found Alex asleep on the bed, having a nightmare.

Mulder lay on the bed and held Alex close, stroking his hair and trying to calm him. He had noticed that the food and water had gone so at least the man was eating. He had spent many years, hating the man in his arms, but he realized that this same man would need him for survival.

He wondered just what the hell had been done to reduce Alex to this state. Mulder decided that he would not give up on Alex, but he had to admit that it felt strange holding and cuddling him.

After drifting off to sleep, Mulder woke to more screaming and to find Alex back in the corner of the room. However he realized that as soon as he left the room the screaming stopped. Mulder had learnt that while Alex was asleep he subconsciously wanted and needed comfort, but when he was awake, Mulder learned to keep his distance.

Mulder took a few days off work, claiming that it was a family emergency. He had managed to dress Alex while he slept. He left him food for the day and, at night, comforted him. Alex ate well when alone and also managed to use the bathroom alone, but it worried Mulder that the man spent his days either huddled up on the bed or in a corner.

After a week, Alex still only let him close while he was asleep; Mulder knew that something had to be done. Mulder was now starting his second week of leave from work. He basically had seven days to deal with Alex.

He knew that it was a rather drastic plan, but Mulder waited until during the day when most of his neighbours were out and at work to enter the bedroom and deal with Alex.

He found Alex huddled in the corner, wincing as he neared the man and the screaming started, Alex sat as far in the corner as he could and screamed as loud as his lungs would let him.

Mulder sat down on the floor in front of the man and waited, he sat there until Alex ran out of energy and could no longer scream and that was when he held him. Alex struggle like a trapped rat but Mulder refused to let go until the struggling ceased.  
However it took another four days of repeating his actions to get results. On the fourth day, Mulder walked into the room and was greeted by silence; he knew that there was a lot more work to be done and a long way to go but at least this was a start.

Life was hard because, in almost two weeks, Alex had never spoken except in his nightmares. So at the moment Mulder had no idea of what the man had suffered, but he knew that when he returned to work he would have no choice but to leave Alex alone.

Mulder was very apprehensive on his return to work: he had even expected to return home to find Alex long gone. However, he was soon to learn that Alex was a well and truly trapped rat. The man would only leave the bedroom when he had to use the bathroom; he would not even sit in the living room. At least, Mulder knew that Alex would not leave the apartment while he was out.

After a while, even though Alex lived in the bedroom, Mulder realized that he had actually got used to the idea of Alex in his home and sharing a bed with the man. Mulder also realized that Alex suffered nightmares nearly every night, but what scared Mulder more than anything at this point was that he was starting to really care for the man.

He was unable to pinpoint his exact emotions, but he cared enough to want Alex to fight whatever had a great hold on him.  
Mulder decided to just take each day as it came, then the day came that he was to go away on a case and risk leaving Alex alone at night-time, alone with his nightmares.

Hell, it was not even like the man would even answer the phone if he called him while away. Mulder bought plenty of bottled water and packet food, he had learnt from experience that Alex would not enter the kitchen and he would only eat if the food was there in his bedroom.

Mulder realized that he now thought of the bedroom as Alex's and not his own. When Mulder entered the bedroom he found Alex in his usual corner, he sat in front of him and held his hand.

"Alex, please listen to me. Hell, I have no idea if you even realize that I am here but I have to leave you and go away for a few days. Hell I really hope that you will still be here when I return"

He squeezed Alex's hand but received no response whatsoever.

"I am going now Alex, but I do really care about you and your future. Do you understand you're not my enemy anymore and I won't hurt you?"

Mulder kissed him on the forehead and grabbed his bags, he was far from happy about the situation but had very little choice. He realized that he wanted Alex to stay and wondered what he would do when the man left, that was one bridge, he would cross when the time came.

Mulder was pissed off with the assignment as after two days he still had no evidence to prove anything, he had also spent two days with Scully bitching about him been so secretive telling him that as his partner she had rights.

He had ended up arriving at home in one hell of a foul mood.  
Mulder opened his apartment door and found the living room and kitchen as he left them. He held his breath and walked towards the bedroom door.

He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Alex on the bed, he had no idea what reaction he would get, but he felt really happy and just wanted to hold the man.

Mulder moved over to the bed and lay beside Alex. He put his arms around him and hugged him close and kissed the top of his head.

"I missed you so much, Alex! I can't even understand my own feelings; everything is so hard at the moment."

"You went away and left me here all alone to die."

"Alex, you spoke! You really spoke to me."

"You left me to die alone."

"Alex, what do you mean as I never left you to die?"

"You have never liked me and you wanted me dead."

"Please listen to me, where are you and why did I leave you to die?"

"You know where the hell I am; you're the one who left me in this fucking silo to die alone."

"Okay Alex, just calm down, I promise that I won't let you die but you need to rest now."

Mulder stroked his hair and then heard Alex's breathing change as he drifted into a troubled sleep. He realized the reason behind Alex's in ability to leave the room... when Alex opened his eyes; he saw the silo and not a bedroom.

Mulder could not understand why this was affecting Alex now. The man had survived after he got out so what was making him believe that he was there now? How would he convince Alex that he was free from that damned silo?

The next morning saw Alex return to his silence once again, Mulder made breakfast and took Alex's in to the bedroom. Alex was back in his corner.

"Alex, please eat your breakfast. Come on, I swear that there's no way I will give up on you."

Alex sat on the floor in the corner just staring at Mulder.

"You want me to die."

"Alex, I would have come home if I knew you were in that silo. Shit, no one deserves to die like that."

"You hate me and want me to die."

Alex refused to speak for some time. Finally Mulder decided to move the TV in to the bedroom.

"Look, Alex, I bet that there was no television in the silo; you see this is just a normal room."

"Why are you here, Fox, and more so what the hell do you want from me?"

"I am trying to help you, Alex, all I want is to see the old Alex return so please talk to me."

"No, you're not real, Fox, you're only here because I wanted you here with me."

"I’m real, Alex, and I’m right here with you."

Mulder went over to the man and held him close.

"See you can feel me, Alex, and I am here for you all the way. Why did you imagine that I was in the silo with you do you really hate me that much and want me to die with you?"

"I would never have wished for you to be dead, Fox."

"So why did you want me there, Alex."

"I never wanted to be alone and all I wanted was you there with me. I love you and needed you with me."

Mulder was shocked by Alex's declaration of love but he decided that maybe Alex had lost all reason. He decided that by playing along with Alex he might get him to open up to him.

"I care about you a lot, Alex, and I am here for you now."

"Yeah, but do you love me, Fox?"

Mulder had not been prepared for that question, but he desperately needed Alex's trust.

"I think that I love you, Alex, but I'm just so confused at the moment."

"Yeah, I bet that you are confused and are wondering how the hell you could have feelings for someone like me."

"That's not true, Alex, hell I’m just all mixed up and you of all people know how fucked up I am."

"Very true, Fox, you're paranoid and insane; oh, and I nearly forgot you're also gorgeous."

"I guess that was all meant to be a compliment."

"Yes, Fox, I have loved you since I was in the FBI, but I always believed that you hated me."

"If you really love me, Alex, you will also have to trust me. Will you trust me and do as I ask?"

"For you, Fox, I would be willing to try anything."

"I want you to just sit here with me and watch a video. You can choose what we watch. Tonight, I will move the TV back so we can watch it in the living room."

Fox saw the fear in Alex's eyes and heard his breathing became more rapid.

"It's okay, Alex. Let's just watch one in here for now."

"Fine, Fox, but do you have any James Bond videos?"

"Yeah, I do... just give me a minute."

Fox returned with the film from 'Russia with Love'; he popped it into the video recorder and pressed play.

"Let's just relax and watch it, Alex, and remember that I’m here for you. At least you're talking to me now and the nightmares are less frequent."

They sat and watched the movie; Fox was pleased with Alex's progress but still needed him to leave the bedroom before he would mention just what had made him this way.

After the movie had come to an end, Fox returned to his PC to work, he was secretly hoping that Alex would become bored alone, but no such luck.

Later that day after finishing his work, Fox went to give Alex some food, he waited until Alex finished the meal then he took him by his hands.

"I am here for you, Alex, come in to the living room with me; I swear that I will remain with you and not leave your side."

"I can't do it, Fox! Please don't make me."  
"Please, at least try, Alex, if you love me then do it for me."

Fox led Alex by the hands into the living room and noticed how bad the man was shaking. He sat him on the couch and pressed play on the VCR and put his arms around Alex and held him close.

"Just sit here with me and imagine that we are safe in the bedroom; try taking deep breaths and you will be all right. I promise"

Alex just nodded while Fox stroked his hair and tried to calm the terrified man, he was totally surprised when Alex suddenly hugged him tight.

"I love you, Fox, please don't leave me here alone."

"Calm down, babe, I promise that I am going nowhere, not now or ever."

Alex kissed Fox on the cheek and hugged him while Fox tried to understand his feelings for the man whom he held. Could his enemy possibly become a lover? Over an hour later, he looked down to find Alex fast asleep and just sat there, holding him for some time. He knew that Alex was an emotional wreck and needed his support. However he had now left the bedroom. At least that was progress.

Over the next few days whatever had a tight grip on Alex and had pulled him down was now slowly releasing him, Fox realized that Alex was becoming more confident and returning to his former self.

Now Alex refused to be held unless he was asleep and never declared his love for Fox anymore, Fox now believed that Alex had just been ill and never meant what he had said.

They both were surprised how well they seemed to get along with each other. Alex finally realized that Fox was his friend and no longer an enemy. However Fox knew the time had arrived to discuss more pressing issues with Alex.

"Alex, you have accepted the fact that you were ill and how you arrived here, but do you have any recollections of any prior events that led to you being here?"

"Shit no! I have no bloody idea and that's what's pissing me off the most."

"Do you really want to know what happened to you, Alex?"

"Yeah, part of me needs to know. All I know by the note you received was that it was Spender who did this to me. I need to know what was done yet part of me fears that the nightmares might return."

"That's a totally understandable reaction, Alex. I just want to know that if I was to be with you, would you be willing to try hypnosis."

"I am willing to try anything at all if it might end this nightmare, but can you arrange for someone to come here so I feel safe."

"I will see when they have someone available."

Fox was surprised that Alex now saw his apartment as somewhere safe yet deep down, he still expected the man to flee. After making a few phone calls he returned to inform Alex that someone would be over later that day.

"Can I just ask you one question, Fox?"

"Anything, Alex."

"Do you want me to leave? Spender expected you to kill me and I'm still alive. I'm afraid he might even hurt you."

"No, you're not leaving, Alex, we will deal with this together, He did say that you were a gift so that means I can do what I want with you."

"Great, I'm the property of one Fox Mulder, mind you I would rather be your slave than Spender's... at least you're good looking."

"I'm pleased to hear that I am better than him. Do you want me to stay or leave when the hypnotist arrives?"

"I want you here with me, Fox; I don't think I can do this alone. If it was not for you, I would be dead by now anyway."

Fox spent the next couple of hours reading while Alex became more and more stressed out. He was pacing then jumped when he heard the door.

"Fuck it, Fox! I don't know if I am ready to do this."

"Please, Alex, just calm down and remember that I will be with you the whole time, please trust me."

"Fine, I trust you, Fox, so can we just get it over with please?"

Fox opened the door to greet Doctor Berber... the man who had once hypnotized him over his sister's disappearance. After introducing the doctor to Alex, he sat down on the couch with Alex beside him.

Once both men were seated, the doctor pulled up a chair and sat facing them ready to begin.

"I know that you feel nervous, Alex, but I am sure Fox has explained the process, I will record the entire event then you will be able to listen when you're ready."

"That's fine, doc, but can we just get the hell on and do it."

"Very good Alex let’s begin then, I want you to relax and try to be calm and when I finish counting you will only hear my voice. Do you understand all that I have told you?"

"Yes."

The doctor started to count down slowly from ten, and once he was ready he spoke to the hypnotized man before him.

"I want you to go back to the time before you arrived at Fox's, can you tell me where you are Alex?"

"It's freezing cold and very dark."

"Are you alone, Alex?"

"As far as I know, but it's too dark to see."

"I want you to move forward, Alex until you arrive at a time that you are not alone."

"No, no, please let me go! God! Please don't do this to me, anything but not this please."

Fox sat there and listened when he felt Alex grab hold of his hand; what had they done to Alex?

"Alex, try and calm down and tell me who's in the room besides you?"

"I don't know who they are but I'm scared! Please don't let them hurt me."

"Stay calm, Alex, and tell me how many people are in the room with you."

"Fuck, I think there's two or three but they won't stop hitting and kicking me, I can't fight back. It hurts and I just want it to end."

"Move forward to a time when the beating ends... can you tell me if you're alone again?"

"No, please god! Leave me alone! It hurts too much."

"Tell me what hurts, Alex, please."

"My whole body feels like it's on fire and the pain is unbearable, I can't take it anymore just make it end."

"What's happening now to cause the pain?"

“They have a knife and have cut my clothes away. I'm naked and in pain and they just keep smiling at me. Please, no, anything, but that. Just let me go, I swear that I will do anything else that you want."

"Alex I know that you are petrified but what scares you so much."

"They're all unfastening their pants then I feel someone over me parting my ass cheeks. Fuck the pain is horrendous as he enters me I feel like I'm been torn apart... God no, after he finishes another one of the bastards takes his place. All I want is to die and be free from the pain."

"Do you know why you are been punished, Alex?"

"Spender must have found out that I passed some information on to Fox."

Fox suddenly felt very sick when he realized that all of Alex's pain was a result of some information he had given him.

"Can you tell me what happens after they hurt you, Alex?"

"Fuck no! I can smell it and I want to be sick. That bastard Spender knows the ultimate way of punishing me."

"What can you smell, Alex?"

"Oil...they keep pouring it all over me and I can taste it in my mouth."

"Can you tell me why the smell of oil bothers you so much?"

"The fucking alien as I heaved it out of my body, I’m in the silo with the fucking alien again."

"Move forward, Alex, and tell me where you are now."

"It's still cold as they left me naked. I'm alone in the dark screaming but no one comes. Even Fox wants me dead."

Fox paled as he realized Alex had really believed that he had left him to die, and why in the silo did he expect different when they were enemies?

"How did Spender know what to do to torture you, Alex?"

"He knew that if he made me relive the silo again it would destroy me."

"But how would he have that knowledge Alex."

"Because Spender was the bastard that put me in the silo with the alien! He had wanted me to die there all alone."

"Do you remember anything at all after they all left you?"  
"I remember screaming until my throat hurt and then nothing more."

"I want you to come back to Fox and me. Can you do that for me, Alex?"

Alex opened his eyes and looked around the room, then he noticed Fox holding his hand but he looked ill.

"Am I to guess by your face, Fox, that I revealed something? Go on...tell me how bad it was”

"Listen to me, Alex. I am here for you but you must listen to the tape first. You need to hear it yourself."

The doctor agreed with Fox and warned Alex that he would need some time for the events to sink in. Dr Berber finally said his goodbyes to both men after telling Alex that he might want some counselling.

"Fox, please inform me why the good doctor believes that I need counselling?"

"Alex, please just listen to the tape and we can work it out from there."

"Fuck it! I have seriously had enough for one day and I don't need the nightmares. I will listen to it in the morning, Fox, so just leave me alone."

"Alex, you know that I will be at work and I think you need someone with you."

"Fuck you, Fox; I'm not a bloody baby and I'm off to bed anyway."

"Please don't be like this! I’m only trying to help you."

"Yeah, well maybe helping someone's overrated; look what happened to me when I tried to help you."

"Please don't blame me, Alex, I tried my best."

"Look, Fox, I'm tired so can we talk before you leave for work?"

Fox never even got the chance to reply as Alex slammed the bedroom door shut. He realized that this would be the first night in months that he would be sleeping on the sofa. He had decided to check on Alex around one pm to find him fast asleep, so Fox just grabbed a blanket and left him alone.

Fox knew that Alex was scared but yet he still found the sudden rejection hurtful.  
Morning came and once Fox was ready for work he found Alex still fast asleep, he decided that they could talk later and decided to leave a note for sleeping beauty.

Alex woke and glanced at the clock then realized it was nearly dinner time. After he used the bathroom Alex noticed the blanket on the couch and felt sick; did Fox now find him repulsive and what had he revealed on that tape? He was panicking when he saw the note on the coffee table.

Alex  
I will be home at the usual time, you were fast asleep and I didn't want to wake you.  
We can talk when I get home but only if you want to. I am so sorry for pushing you last night.  
Anything for you.  
Fox x

Yeah, sure Fox wanted to talk when he seemed to be avoiding him. Alex went in to the kitchen and noticed the bottle of vodka and decided that would do for breakfast.

He then sat and played the tape. The more he heard, the more he drank! He would kill Spender for this and no wonder Fox wanted to keep his distance.

By four pm, Alex was totally drunk and severely depressed so he decided that Fox could go to hell. If Fox no longer wanted his company, Alex would leave.

Over an hour later, Alex had packed a bag with clothes and, after taking one last look around, he walked out of the door, straight in to Fox who had returned early.

"Where the fuck do you think you're going, Alex?"

"Get out of my way; it's got nothing to do with you."

"Alex, you're upset and drunk. Please just come inside and talk to me."

"We have nothing to talk about; everything suddenly became very clear to me."

"Well, it's not fucking clear to me, Alex, go inside and sleep it off. If after we talk, you still want to leave, so be it."

Alex realized that he was drunk and that his head was spinning. Fine! Maybe he could use some sleep first.

"Fine, whatever, Fox, but talking won't change a bloody thing."

Fox stood and watched as Alex went in to the bedroom and slammed the door, he could not believe that after everything Alex was just going to run away.

He sat in front of the TV for a few hours until he fell asleep on the couch. Fox woke up really early so that he could talk to Alex. He had so many feelings for him and maybe it was time to tell him.

Upon entering the bedroom, Fox found the bed empty but noticed the note on the dresser.

Fox you said that you would do anything for me or give me what I need to recover, but you never understood what I wanted and needed, the only one thing that I have wanted for years.

All I ever wanted was you, Fox, and, no, it was never just because you helped me. Hell I have wanted you for so long but was always your enemy.

Now you decide that we can be friends, which is nice but not enough as I want what I can never have. This is hard, Fox, but I want you as my lover, and maybe now you will understand why I must leave.

I am sorry that things have gone bad but I will never forget what you did for me.  
Take care Fox.  
Love always.  
Alex xx

Fox realized that Alex must have left a while ago, and he was one hard man to find. He felt more alone than he had in years but how would he ever find Alex and tell him he loved him? What if Spender found him first?

Alex Krycek had found the last few days hard, he had known that Mulder never really wanted him. Now he was alone after he had spent the last few months having someone there; there was no one to comfort him after the nightmares.

Alex just kept moving as he was afraid of staying in one place for too long, but finally his luck ran out which was not unusual for him. Alex went to a bar to get drunk and that was where one of Spenders goons found him.

  
Alex found himself stripped and left in a cold room. He had been informed that when he sobered up, he would face that cancerous bastard. He sat there alone freezing and thinking about his last encounter with Spender.

The man was responsible for the rape and the oil; Spender had come so close to destroying him. Alex wondered if Spender would succeed this time.

Mulder was at a loss with himself, he had realized too late that he was in love with Alex, now he was alone and needed to find him, so he decided to pay the lone gunmen a visit.

Mulder had told them that he needed Alex found and that Spender needed to be watched, he was pleased that the gunmen never wanted a reason why. He would have to just go back to his normal life, and pray that Alex was found.

Alex was dragged out of the room and came face to face with Spender.

"It looks like I will have to take care of you, Alex, it appears that my son was incapable of that job."

"Do what the fuck you want, Spender; I have no reason to live anyway."  
"Oh Alex, dear boy, don't you worry. This time I will break you and I will have you begging me to kill you."

"Fuck you, Spender."

Spender never even replied to Alex; he only spoke to the two men that held him.

"Take him downstairs to the basement and prepare him; I will be down shortly."

Alex was dragged to the basement by the two men, praying that he would not be left alone in the dark. He was also wondering what was to be his punishment.

He soon found himself facing a cold concrete wall with his arms and legs stretched apart and chained to the rings embedded in the cement. Alex was left there for a while alone with only his thoughts for company. The only thing that was keeping him going were the thoughts of Fox holding him and caring for him.

Alex knew that deep down it had all been a lie. The last couple of nights Fox had kept his distance, but for now he had to believe that this one time in his sad pathetic life someone had wanted him.

Sometime later, the door opened and Alex heard Spender's voice.

"Well, Alex, let's finish what my son never had the guts to do shall we."

"You really believe that Mulder's soft? Fuck! You don't know him at all, Spender."

"You're still alive, Alex, that tells me what I need to know."

"You really believe that because I’m alive that Mulder never hurt me?"

"Maybe you would like to tell me what went on while you were with my son: I am waiting, Alex."

"Fuck you, Spender."

Alex felt the whip hit hard across his back; he had to bite his lip to stifle the scream.

"Come on, Alex, talk to me or the pain gets worse."

"Fuck you, you can go to hell first, you black lunged bastard."

The whip came down repeatedly until Alex had no choice but to scream. He screamed until his throat became raw and his legs became weak; soon his arms were taking the full weight of his body.

"I will ask you once more, Alex, what happened while you were with my son?"

Alex found it difficult to talk but he would never tell Spender that Mulder had cared. He needed the cancerous bastard to believe that Mulder was like him.

"All I will tell you Spender is that Mulder is a cold hearted bastard like his father."

Spender turned to the two men that had remained in the room and spoke to them.

"I want him unchained, then lay him on the floor on his stomach; oh... and make sure you cuff his hands to the rings."

Alex felt the rough hands on his naked body, and he knew that he had no strength left to fight the two men. Soon he was face down on the cold floor with his hands chained; all he could do was wait... knowing that Spender was not finished with him yet.

“I’m going to leave you alone for some time, Alex, when I return you had better have some answers ready for me regarding my son."

Alex lay there all alone, he knew that his back was going to be sore for a long time hell not that he had long left as Spender was pissed off and had wanted him dead before.

That was the only reason Spender had given him to Mulder in the first place, to get his own son to do his dirty work.  
Soon the door opened and that was when Alex realized that he had drifted off to sleep, he tried to shut himself away in his mind and prepared for whatever Spender planned next.

Alex felt the man sit over his thighs part his ass cheeks. He knew that he was going to be raped and that he had survived it before; he just had to block it out and think of something else.

The man was less than gentle, ramming his cock deep inside him, but after the man had grunted a few times, he came and it was over or so Alex thought until he had heard Spender yelling at the man who had raped him.

"You idiot, I said hurt him not make love to him, I want you to make him scream and beg for it to be over."

Soon Alex was to know just what great pain really was. After the man had withdrawn his wilting cock, he immediately replaced it with something else, and that was when Alex really started to scream.

The man was not just happy to shove his fingers in to Alex's ass; after all the man had to impress Spender and make Alex scream... The man had worked his whole hand deep in to Alex's backside, he had then started to twist and clench his fist. Alex could even feel the man's rings as they tore his ass apart. Finally Alex had screamed himself in to oblivion to find peace.

What had caused Alex to rouse was the sudden pain as his back was pressed against something. He realized that he was been placed in the boot of a car, naked, cuffed, and gagged. When he looked up, he saw Spender grinning at him.

"Your time is up, Alex; this is where it all ends for you."

The boot slammed shut and the engine started; after a while the car had stopped but no one came to let him out. Was this to be his fate just left to die alone in the dark?

Mulder finally received the call he had been waiting for...Langley informed him that Spender had been watched closely. They had no idea if the man had Alex or not until an hour ago.

Spender's goons were seen loading a naked man in to the boot of a car; two cars had left, driving to a car scrap dealer. Only one car had come back out and it was not the one with the man in the boot.

Mulder felt sick as he realized the fate of that car and the man in it; the car had been left to be crushed. Langley also informed Mulder that Spender's men were still hanging around until the job was done.

Mulder grabbed the phone and called the scrap dealer; he told him that he was an FBI agent and that the car the dealer had just received was not to be crushed. He then grabbed his keys and drove there as fast as he dared, making only made one stop on the way.

There was something he needed to buy just in case Spender put in an appearance. When Mulder arrived at the scrap yard, he located the owner and asked where the car was. Once the owner had checked out Mulder's id, he led him to the car.

Mulder checked out the interior of the car to find it empty so he moved towards the boot to see if that held any clues whatsoever.  
However he found the boot locked and asked the owner for a crowbar. When Mulder pried open the boot, he nearly threw up at the sight that greeted him.

Alex lay there naked and gagged; Mulder could not help but see the dried blood and all the cuts. That was when Mulder heard the voice of the man he despised and wanted to see dead.

"Agent Mulder, may I ask what brings you out here?"

"Like you don't fuckin know, Spender?"

"Just turn around and walk away, Agent Mulder, what's going on is no concern to you at all."

"He's mine, Spender, you gave him to me and he's my property now."

Mulder tried to handle Alex without causing too much pain, he needed the man alert and out of the car.

"You, Agent Mulder, were given him to finish him off, but you never had the guts to do it."

Alex had managed to pull himself up on his knees but after so much pain he decided to remain quiet, knowing that Spender would be angry that Fox had interfered with his plans.  
"Alex Krycek was given to me as a gift; I was led to believe that I could use him anyway I see fit to extract my revenge... revenge for all he has done to myself and the ones I love."

"That's very true, Agent Mulder, but you decided to play happy family with him instead."

"Whatever gave you that idea, Spender? Why would I want to kill him when I can keep him as my pet and torture him? Your way would be too quick for the likes of that dirty rat."

"So let me get this right, you, Agent Mulder want him to spend the rest of his life as your pet. I can see that you seriously underestimate Alex Krycek and don't realize that he might end up killing you."

"In my opinion, Spender, I seriously believe that you underestimate me; you must have heard of the saying; like father like son."

Mulder knew that Spender was watching his every move just waiting for him to slip up. However much he loved Alex, he had to convince Spender that he loathed and despised the man. Mulder walked towards the kneeling man and pulled his head hard by his hair, slapping Alex hard across the face, Mulder removed the gag from the distressed man's mouth; all he saw in Alex's eyes was fear.

"Look at me, Alex! You do realize that I will have to punish you for running away from me."

Alex looked up into Mulder's face and all he saw was hate; the kindness had all gone. Still, Alex decided that if he had a choice he would rather take his chance with Fox than Spender any day.

"Yes, Mulder, I know that I will be punished for disobeying you and running away."

Mulder pulled the item he had bought from his pocket, fastening the collar around Alex's neck and attached a lead.

"He belongs to me. Spender, you gave him to me as a present and there's no way that I will kill him, however he will learn to obey me even if I had to build a fuckin cage for him."

"Fine, Agent Mulder, I can see how this could be a harsh punishment for our dear Alex, and I also realize that you can have some fun along the way and extract your revenge."

"So, Spender, does that mean you are willing to accept that he's mine?"

"Take him, Agent Mulder, and go. Be warned that if I ever see him again that I will kill him myself."

Spender walked towards his waiting car and called his henchmen to follow, Mulder gave a heavy sigh of relief as Spender left and then he moved fast, laying Alex on the back seat of his car. Once he had the injured man covered up; he headed for his apartment.

Alex was absolutely exhausted and ached all over, however his biggest worry was what would happen to him now but at the moment he was too tired to even think.

Mulder watched Alex as he slept, and he knew by the man's face that he was having a nightmare; he wondered how long the nightmares would haunt Alex?

Once Mulder arrived home and had managed to get Alex in to the apartment; he made him sit and got him a glass of water before prepared himself for his next task.

"Alex, can you go and lay down on the bed for me please."

"Yeah whatever Fox, do you want me on my back or front?"

"Just lie on you stomach Alex, I will come and join you when I have what I require."

Mulder grabbed the towels and water and headed in to the bedroom; he found Alex on his stomach and struggled not to throw up.

Alex's back was covered in deep cuts and bruises. Mulder wondered just how much Alex had suffered in life and that was when he noticed that Alex was sobbing quietly in to the pillow.

"Alex, talk to me and tell me what I can do to make it better. I swear that I will be as gentle as I can with you."  
"I don't give a fuckin shit what you do, Fox, hurt me all you want as I've had far worse in life than you."

"Why the tears then?"

"Because I repulse you."

"Alex, what the hell gave you that idea?"

"Like you don't know, Fox, hell, you can't even look me in the face as you rape me."

Mulder looked down and realized that Alex lay with his legs parted. He really believed that he had been sent to lie on the bed to get raped. Mulder ran in to the bathroom and threw up violently, after he had rinsed out his mouth her returned to the bedroom to find Alex still waiting.

"Alex, please get on your side and face me."

Fox lay down beside the stricken man and held him close.

"Please listen to me; I think we have our wires crossed and need to talk."

Fox stroked Alex's soft hair and kissed the top of his head, he knew that Alex was awake but was remaining quiet.

"Alex, I am truly sorry that I had to hit you. I had no choice and had to make Spender believe that I hated you. I swear here and now that I would never hurt you on purpose and as for raping you, please tell me Alex why you thought that was what I was going to do to you?"

"Because you hate me, Fox, and the day I was hypnotized you could not even bring yourself to share a bed with me... filthy Alex, raped and abused, and you thought I was disgusting."

  
"Alex, you fell asleep so I decided to leave you to get some rest, I believed that you wanted to be alone. Do you not realize that it has also been hard for me, so many months of sleeping with you and then back to the couch?"

"But I could never have what I wanted, Fox; you held me after the nightmares and even kissed me but it was never sexually. Do you know how it feels to share a bed with someone who you love but can't touch?"

"Yes, Alex, I believe that I do know how that feels as I am doing it right now, hell after you left I realized just how much I love you. Shit Alex I am so afraid to touch you or hurt you more than you already have been."

"Please Fox if you are telling the truth and really love me kiss me."

They shared a long kiss releasing so many trapped emotions; then Fox felt Alex's hard cock pressing against his thigh.

"Forget it; I have no intentions of having sex with you until you have fully recovered, and then we can make love babe, then I will show you just how much I love you."

"Please, Fox, I need you immediately."

"I am sorry, but I am not prepared to hurt you anymore, please for me can you wait and let's just talk and plan our own future."

"I have never had to plan for the future, Fox, as they were made for me."

"I can't keep you shut up here forever, Alex, but if Spender sees you alone he might kill you. Plus how do I know that you won't run away again?"

"Fox, I only ran because I believed that you hated me! Why would I run when I have everything I want right here? I also presume that I will have to stay with you then to avoid Spender."

"There's bound to be times that I have to go away Alex and then what, how the hell can I leave you alone."

"Fox, I will survive, I guess that I will have to be very careful unless you have any other suggestions."

"Yeah, as a matter of fact I do have some ideas. I want to take a month off work and be with you, at one point I thought that I had lost you for good."

"So dear Fox, what would you have us do for a whole month then."

"Not what you think Alex so don't even go there. We can get to know each other better and look for somewhere else to live."

"You really want to move away from here with me, Fox?"

"Yes, Alex, you are my life now also it would be safer for the pair of us."

"Can we move somewhere bigger then Fox? I do have some money if it's going to be a problem."

"That would be great, Alex, a home of our own, just me and you together."

"So when can we start looking?"

"If it makes you happy Alex, we will look in the morning, just let me ring work first and tell them that I need the time."

Alex agreed to let Fox bathe all his cuts and clean him up, he then laid there and fell asleep in the arms he had always wanted to be in.

It had taken just two weeks to find a home that they both agreed on, the house was in a very remote location with a huge garden which suited both men. There was also a swimming pool and Fox was pleased that Alex might finally get the fresh air his body so much needed.

Even though Alex was sulking at the moment as Fox refused to make love, well at least until they had moved. The move went very smoothly as there were only Fox's stuff to take.

Once they had moved in and got settled Fox arranged for the lone gunmen to deal with the security, they had the house along with the ground fully secure and Alex now had some freedom.

Fox realized that Alex was glowing with happiness and now looked well, he also realized that the time had come to carry out his promise.

Fox claimed that he was exhausted and needed an early night knowing that Alex would soon follow. They had spent every night sleeping in their boxers and both trying to resist temptation, Fox had been so scared of hurting the man he had fallen in love with.

However tonight Fox climbed in to bed naked and waited for Alex. Soon Alex appeared in the bedroom and undressed he was just about to climb in to bed when Fox spoke.

"Remove your underwear, Alex."

Fox watched as Alex's face showed so much confusion but then suddenly the man had the most gorgeous smile. He jumped on to the bed and hugged and kissed Fox.

"Do you mean it, Fox? Please say that you want to fuck me now."

"No, Alex, I am not going to fuck you, I am planning to make love to you, babe."

"About time, lover, as it's been almost a year now and all we do is kiss and touch."

"True, Alex, but this might be over very quick as it's been so long."

Alex silenced the protesting man with a long kiss, only ending the kiss to grab the lube and condoms. Alex enjoyed the feel of Fox's cock in his hand as he slowly rolled on the condom.

"Alex, please, or I will come in your hand."

  
"Sorry, lover. I could not resist the temptation."

Alex then applied some lube to Fox and to himself, he deliberately took his time inserting one finger then two in to his tight ass. Fox laid there memorized by the other man's actions imagining the feel of that tight ass around his own throbbing cock.

"Fuck, Alex, what are you trying to do to me, babe?"

"Sorry, Fox, I got carried away imaging that it was you inside me."

"Get moving and it could be me."

Fox had expected Alex to lie on the bed but was surprised when his lover sat over him instead and positioned his cock against Alex's anus. However Fox soon forgot to think as he felt Alex's hot tight ass around his cock.

"I needed you inside me lover, and only you, Fox... just make me yours so I can forget everyone else."

"Alex, I will come if you keep talking like that, but I assure you that no one else will ever touch you as you're mine now."

Alex leaned back until the other man's cock was as far as it would go, only then did he start a rhythm. Fox watched Alex as he moved up and down he realized just how gorgeous the man was, Fox knew that he was going to come as he had never been this fulfilled and happy in his life.

However before he came he vowed to himself that he would kill any man who hurt Alex again, he only ever wanted to see him happy from now on. Soon both men could take no more or wait any longer; they both reached orgasm and collapsed on the bed.

"I love you so much, Fox, and it's still so hard to believe that you want me."

"I love you too, babe, and I promise that we will have a good life together."

Soon both men fell asleep in each other's arms. However the month went very fast and soon Fox had to return to work. Alex spent his time indoors decorating and doing repairs and making their home how they wanted it.

After three months back at work, Fox realized that it would soon be Christmas and that he really wanted to take Alex for a night out. The man had been a prisoner for so long and needed to get out. When Fox returned from work one night, he decided that he would talk to Alex about it.

Alex had protested trying to convince Fox that it was a bad idea but he would not accept no as an answer. As Christmas was only a week away, Fox found a restaurant and booked a table, he also found a club to go to later that evening. When the night had arrived, Alex had become tense and nervous.

"Please, Fox, don't make me go out, you promised that we would have a great Christmas together in our new home."

"We still will have a great Christmas, Alex, what the hell has that got to do with going out tonight?"

"How would it be a good Christmas if something was to happen to one of us, hell or even both of us?"

"Please, Alex, can you do it for me? I can understand your concern but I think it would be a better Christmas if you have one fear less."

"Fine! Whatever shuts you up?"

Alex stormed out of the room to get ready, and Fox knew that Alex was not really angry with him it was just his fear of the outside world.

Later that night after both dressed smartly, they had left their home... that was, after about four attempts. Fox was pleased that he had decided to set off early so that they would arrive at the restaurant on time.

The evening had started off very tense but throughout the meal Fox noticed Alex start to relax. By the time they reached the club Alex was drunk and in a very good mood. Fox was pleased that he had forced Alex to go out but decided that it was time to go home.

Neither man noticed the black car parked near the club or the smoke that came from the window.

The next morning Alex laid on the sofa suffering from a hangover, yet despite everything he was glad that they had gone out together.

He lay watching the man he loved as he sat on the end of the couch opening the day's mail, then suddenly he was as white as a ghost and ran to the bathroom. Fox believed that Alex was suffering the morning after and waited for him to return.

"God, you look ill, Alex, are you sure it's just a hangover?"

"Spender knows where we live, Fox. We have to move again or he will kill us!"

"Alex, please calm down and tell me how you know that!"

"The letter on the coffee table Fox, hell I would recognize that cancerous bastards handwriting anywhere."

"Sit down Alex and breathe while I open it then, if Spender knows where we live and wanted us dead he would have sent an assassin not a letter."

Fox managed to get Alex to see sense and calm down then he read the letter out loud to find out what Spender's game was now.

  
Dear Fox,  
It was a nice surprise to see you again and looking so healthy.  
I also see that you know how to look after your pet rat or should I say lover. I am not a stupid man Fox and have been aware for some time that you and Alex are lovers.

However as you once said to me that he was a gift, so I guess that you can choose to do what you want.  
I have seen you around, Fox, and realized how happy you appear, but after seeing you last night, I saw the love that you have for each other.

  
All I ask is that you be careful because if love ever turns to hate, it can make you a different person. I speak from bitter experience as I once was in love with someone; she even gave birth to my son and then chose to be with her husband.

Fox, I realize that the time has come to move forward and leave the past behind.

As long as you or your lover never cross me, you could both live a long life. I will now leave you to live your life as you choose.  
I was never a father to you but I will leave Alex alone if it means maybe I did just one good thing for you in my life.  
Merry Christmas son to you both.  
C.G.B Spender.

"Do you really believe him, Fox? Do you think that he will leave us alone?"

"He knows that we are lovers and even knows where we live, Alex. We need to remain alert but... yeah I believe that he has finally let you go babe."

"You mean that we can now have a life together, Fox, and that you can spoil me and take me out more."

"I believe that Spender must have realized the error of his ways, either that or he was visited by ghosts like Ebenezer Scrooge."

Finally Alex realized that for once in his life he was free... not that anything would really change as he already had the life he wanted and the man he loved.

Alex's life had been one long hard road of pain and unhappiness, however the road that had led to the ultimate punishment had also led to a life that he had only ever dreamed about and a perfect Christmas.

The Ultimate Punishment

By CarolelaineD

  
Merry Christmas and a big thank you to everyone past and present who has given so many wonderful stories to us Nick lea fans. Critics make writers better but just remember those same people gave up their time and effort for us by writing the stories.

Also, Merry Christmas to the readers who make the writing worthwhile.  
And lastly, Merry Xmas, Nick.  
Happy 2009 everyone.

 


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